STRANGERS IN THE SHITE

Sunday XI vs. Moulscomb District, 25th July

 

·          Skipper PB Tits is introduced to his team as no fewer than four players make their Sunday debut: Myles Machin (pinched from Ansty); Nick Mercado (borrowed from Revvin); James Fraser (another Ardingly teacher recruited by Grig, and yes, he has taught Yvann); Richard Webster (Cliff’s new drinking partner).

·          We lose the toss and on a hot afternoon on a friendly looking pitch, we’re invited to bat – strange!

·          The normal Staplefield collapse sees us at 15-2, then 41-5 with two of our four new aces already back in the hutch.

·          Zim and Angus cobble together a stand of 27 before normal service is resumed. Will Zim be caught or bowled? – it’s caught today.

·          A pulsating last wicket partnership of 28, the highest of the innings between Revvin and Limahl sees us reach 122 all out of the last delivery of the innings. An unusual last over sees five dot balls and a wicket. Bizarelly, six players have reached double figures but no-one passes 20! Limahl posts a season’s best of 13*.

·          Over tea, we desperately try and convince ourselves that 122 gives us something to bowl at but frankly no-one’s convinced.

·          A new Sunday opening attack makes its debut – Limahl and Zim. Lines and lengths are good and the oppo struggle to score without looking like losing a wicket.

·          Biffa tells Tits “You should give my mate Richard a bowl”.

·          Skip ignores his VC and opts for the seam-up of Meccano Man. Suddenly wickets start to tumble as Moulsecoomb lose five in quick succession.

·          Biffa tells Tits “You should give my mate Richard a bowl”.

·          Skip ignores his VC and opts for the seam-up of new recruit James Fraser. Sadly he fails to emulate his namesake Angus and is removed from the attack after just one expensive over.

·          Biffa tells Tits “You should give my mate Richard a bowl”.

·          Skip ignores his VC and opts for the Moormanator. Kev obliges with a spell of 3-16.

·          A smart bit of work by Meccano Man sees another wicket fall, run out.

·          Biffa tells Tits “You should give my mate Richard a bowl”.

·          Skip listens to his VC and brings Webster on. He captures his first wicket since he left school (apparently) to win the game.

·          Joy unconfined in the Tanners as we muse on the likelihood of winning a game in which our top scorer got just 18 runs.